The other day I watched a film about a recovering alcoholic.
I couldn’t help but draw some parallels to my life at the moment. Not to demean the experience of an addict, but as I watched this woman in the film deal with her drinking problems I could definitely relate them to the changes unfolding in front of me; facing my demons and digging deep. Attempting to lose a whole heap of weight in a short amount of time drives one to the brink at times.
This task I’ve put myself on requires I stay true to myself at all times and not get swayed back into bad habits or my ‘old ways’. It’s the one thing I just can’t cut corners with, I can’t cheat this thing; the scales do not tell lies. As ridiculous as this rant sounds the sport I have chosen (boxing) is an irate one! I mean, I am talking about things like if I am 10grams over my weight division I am immediately suspended from competition, no matter how long I may have trained for that fight.
Teresa my dietician has been a life line. As I mentioned in my earlier blog, she takes my calls and queries whenever and at anytime of the day, something like a sponsor if you will, like Alcoholics Anonymous. I know this sounds cheeky, but I thought of these similarities as I was watching this same film. When I am tittering on the edge I give her a message: “Teresa, is it OK I eat this chocolate, its 85% dark… if I eat this…will it wreck my calorie intake?” Thank God she happens to be a very tolerant and patient person otherwise I would be stuffed. Most of the time she just laughs at me.
‘D Day’ is what I call weigh ins. Not that I need to weigh in a lot because Teresa does not believe in this but the idea of standing on the scales still scares the b’jesus out of me. Dramatic it sounds but I think it may have something to do with my past experience in a training camp in Europe where I was weighed twice a day. I mean, if I was hovering slightly over my weight I was interrogated about what I had eaten that day. It really does become an imprisoning disposition and I do not recommend anyone to do such a thing. I am happy to say that I have healed myself from that experience and weight is no longer such a dangerous force in my psychology. Not to say that it still doesn’t take centre stage, as it does for most boxers but now that I have a strong team behind me, I feel like I can make informed decisions about my weight and nutrition – the first time in my life. And I can focus on the bigger picture; training and winning which I am happy to say I won my fight in Melbourne last weekend.
The chick I fought was huge! Probably the tallest girl I have ever boxed. I was nearly leaping off the ring floor trying to reach her face; luckily my coach in my corner reminded me that I could go for the easier and more accessible option called her body! So, one fight down and won in glorious Melbourne where the sun doesn’t always shine but the place never lets me down.
There are many opportunities to spar in Melbourne, probably the most in any other state in Australia, so I stayed a week which in the most part was good until I met the most unpleasant boxer I have ever encountered in the boxing world. She is a professional boxer, local girl, and three time world champ. We met in a spar one day, things got heated, and I got the better of her in the spar so she threw me on the ground and used every dirty tactic you can think of (punching in the back of the head, punching after the bell, trash talking me in between rounds). I mean I couldn’t have written a better script if I had wanted to. What meeting this girl did for me was immeasurable. It showed me everything I do not want to be. I do not want fame or success to delude my own self image or the way I treat others. I want to keep my feet on the ground and stay real. Hopefully my friends will keep me in check and remind me of these things along the way. I think these blogs, will also be an aid, helping me stay accountable to a wider audience, and so thank you to those who read this.
Introspection along the path to the Commonwealth Games sounds like a nice plan to me.
Anyhow next stop: Goulbourn – Friday night where I am to once again fight a huuuuuge girl. I will remember this time to hit the body…
-Bianca ‘Bam Bam’